"It's time to take myself in hand."

Let me come straight to the point: Being an orphan sucks. (Or it will, suck.)

Not only are there the obvious reasons for which it does (suck), i.e. i hate living like a boy/pig/etc [i watched all three American Pie movies last night and killed about 300 brain cells laughing while the guy f___s a pie], there's also the emotional part of it... being without a mother's love is like... it's like.. - blah blah you get the point- i just HATE looking at that ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTING BROWN STUFF THAT'S SEEPING OUT FROM THE CUPBOARD WHICH WE DO NOT OPEN. I do not understand. We - well, my sister and cynthia, my cousin - clean it up everyday but yet. THERE IT IS. IN YOUR FACE. Mockingly disturbing to the point where someday we might just be forced to open it. (the CWWDNO.) Removing all the masking tape and all. And we all know that the masking tape is there it for a REASON. The reason is that it is a friggin CWWDNO. And that's all there is to it. Seriously. And let's not forget the moldy juice. YES, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, MOLDY ARTICLE #2.
We found it (the layer of mold) floating innocently on the glass of juice when we got back from the floating casino.

The Floating Casino

• We naively thought it was Superstar Virgo or something when my grandmother suddenly called to ask us (cynthia, vicky, and i, together with my malaysian aunty and cousin) to come along, with her morning walk buddies, saying that it's "very cheap ah!"
• It was so not Titanic. There was this one time, at band camp (American Pie, sorry), when I thought the ship was shuddering. It was, sadly, only me. And there were zero guys on deck our age. Only 40, 50 ++ year old aunties and uncles, and a few random children unwittingly brought along where their only entertainment would be the
• Lousy pool, which wasn't even filled when we arrived.
• However, the tiny pod of a room was okay.
• And was on the side without windows, which I think is a good thing cause I won't feel as dizzy. I'm still, now, on solid ground, suffering from serious boat-lag; I keep feeling woozy and wobbly. But the water temperature was TERRIBLE. It was so HOT I'm positive a few of my skin cells permanently died that night.
• AND YES... It did make me lose some cash. (give or take, it's still less than $10 LAH)
• Well, a girl can't resist the temptation, can she. (A FRIGGIN CASINO. VEGAS, BABYY!)
• However, the jackpot loss was practically forced upon. See, they charge $180 for the trip then they give you $100 jackpot vouchers for you to lose 掉 on the jackpot computer machines which didn't even look authentic. I mean, i know it's the 21st century but can we please retain the lever to pull? Maybe they think it's so much easier to just press a small square buttom for every roll, thus, easier to let your money go. Conniving lil fellas from
• China. Yes, they hire chinese people to be the dealers in the casino and the waiters and waitresses and bartenders. The captain of the ship was an ang moh, though, unsurprisingly. But by some sick twist of bad case of whatsit, the cleaners and maintenance crew of the ship were all ang mohs too! Can someone explain, please.
• Anyway we played Blackjack -AfricanAmericanJack- with a computer. (Because children weren't allowed to play with the real deal. Boo.) There was this table where you can just slot in a $10 bill or more and start playing on the computer touchscreens. It's a lot of fun when there's a lot of uncleaunties playing too cause we all just make a lot of noise (eg "PICTURE, AH PEH, AH PEH!" -hokkien for old man which means picture card) and scold the blardy computer when we lose and laugh our heads off when the dealer 'busts' (takes too much cards and so has to pay everybody). Kinda silly, if you think about it, but who cares! Then there was this girl (about our age) who slotted in a $10 and walked away with $50 ++. We all called her the 'cha bo' (hokkien for young girl) and laughed when she bangs the table calling out "Ah PEH!" in that weird way of hers while actually secretly admiring her gambling skills :P
• Has a karaoke lounge which no one goes to and has everyone wincing while they pass by because somehow a lost wandering uncleaunty will be croning for the whole ship to hear - will they pay extra to use one of the private ktv rooms? Oh no, why should they, they've got 'talent' they shouldn't hide! The morning walk friend, she sings there day and night. This one time, we went to sit with her, chased away the waitress asking us to 'order drinks or get out', and listened to this chinese woman singing (or trying v. hard to) to three children, not including the aunty and us. The singer even said the children were 'lured' in by her singing! So, in other words, before the children came, she was singing to one person and one person only. How pathetic can that be! Even the piano has scotch tape on it. (I know, because I've played it, in the morning before it opens.)
• Moving on.. It has average buffet food. I can't believe they served roti prata one of the nights. Trying too hard, my chinese friends.
• Has a pretty cool cockpit- minxy little cynthia talked an indonesian crew guy into bringing us there.
• Was altogether a fun experience. I mean it. Between all the mirrors put up everywhere and the whole old fashioned 1980s decor and disco balls everywhere, we had fun.

MAN, I haven't even begun to talk about yesterday's very exciting events. Involving handcuffs, my first time at Far East Plaza, sneaking into a cinema, hot(!) japanese guys and a pickpocket who almost stole my handphone.

Oh well. You gotta quit while you're ahead. And the House always wins!

Does that make any sense? I didn't think so.

Ciao!

- The Only Parent

(You know. 'Only child'... 'Only parent'? God.)

p.s. notice most of the photos are have vicky? (particularly the mold one cuz she DID go without bathing for 2 1/2 days after her b'day..) anyway, it's actually because she had her birthday on the last day of the cruise! feel honoured, vick! =) here's one of her at the late night birthday party/gathering below our block. look how happy she is!